09 ways to begin doing what you love! (goal setting & time management)
“Are you the Boss?”
Today most of us have one complain and that is “we are too busy and don’t even have time to die.” Business that we have in our lives is self-created. There is nobody else to complain about it except us. This business is ruining our health, wealth, peace and most importantly our relationship with loved ones as we don’t have time. Here we will talk about 10 simple ways which I have put together in the hope of proving you with a perspective which can also be part of you and help you have a break from busyness.
We all normally think, and it also looks like that positive thinking and attention deficit disorder (ADD) have nothing to do with each other. But people who have ADD tends to develop negative thinking patterns as they are irritated by our regular challenges and feelings of being overwhelmed. This negative outlook makes it even more difficult for us to handle those challenges and move forward.
The practice of positive thinking allows people with ADD to focus on our strengths and achievements, which increases happiness and motivation. This, in turn, allows us to spend more time making progress and less time feeling depressed and stagnant. The following tips provide practical suggestions that you can use to help you shift to more positive thinking patterns
1. Self Love
Take good care of yourself as you are the most important person on your life. You can’t love others if you are not able to love yourself. As the famous saying “charity begins at home.” Be your best friend. Practice positive thinking, exercise regularly and get enough rest. Put in the correct fuel in your vehicle, as poor-quality fuel reduces the life of your expensive vehicle and you will not have to take it to the Doctors. Basically, eat well to have a smooth ride with your body on the road of life. Healthy diet is helpful in developing positive outlook for life.
Gratitude is the simplest antidote for stress, anxiety and depression, the biggest obstructions in your way to happy life. Always remember the things you are grateful for in your life. Write them down everyday to remind yourself how blessed you are to have them. Be grateful for all the little and the littlest things as there are millions on this planet who even don’t have them.
When in life you are going through a rough phase try to focus on the things that you are grateful for, like the house you live in, your beautiful kids, your health and so on.
If you take 1 minute daily to pause and appreciate all your things as blessing, that would make a huge difference in your life. And if you write down 5 things from your day that you are grateful for before going to bed would have magical impact in your life.
3. Stop Assuming
Assumptions are the biggest killer of our happiness and peace, you need to look for proof instead of making assumptions. This will resolve most of the unwanted thoughts in your mind. We tend to assume what others think about us and develop the feeling of being not loved and accepted. But our assumptions and fears are generally not true.
Sometimes we are afraid that the bad mood of a friend or family member is due to something we did, or that our colleagues are secretly gossiping about us. We just need to turn our back, talk and ask them. Don’t waste your time worrying about something unless you have proof that there is something to worry about.
4. No Absolutes
We need to refrain from using absolutes as they hold little truth about the situation or action we are referring to. As I always say to my wife that “you are always late!” but when I analysed this statement of mine closely, what I found was that she takes bit longer when we are going out to some special event. Or have you complained to your friend when he calls you, “you never call me,” funny.
Thinking and speaking in absolute terms like “always” and “never” makes the situation seem worse than it is, and programs your brain to believe that certain people are unable to deliver.
5. Divorce your negative thoughts
You need to separate from your negative thoughts as we sperate from a friend with negative influence. I know it’s difficult to cut off from your childhood friend, but sometimes it becomes necessity for your own good. Similarly, don’t let your thoughts have power over you.
When you have a negative thought, just notice it like your least favourite person and ignore it. Just don’t give it any attention and it would eventually loose it’s power. Be the witness of the thought not the thought itself.
6. Kill the “ANTs”
I’m a big fan of Dr Daniel Amen and his philosophy about the power of brain. In his book “Change your brain, change your life”, he talks about “ANTs” – Automatic negative thoughts. These are the thoughts that are usually reactionary, like when we walk into a restaurant and think all people are looking at us, or when colleagues are laughing, we automatically assume that they are laughing at us. My humble request to all my readers is that please stop giving yourself so much importance. Like you are busy in your life and work, and don’t have time for others, likewise they have no time for you.
Try to notice your ANTs and kill them. Even killing a few will generate abundance of happiness in your life and you will save loads of energy from this, which you can utilise in other more important things. With practice and focus you can become a great ANT killer and the happier version of you.
7. Quality Socialising
If you are a shy person start socialising or even an outgoing one you need to check the company in which you socialise. Because you pick up the energy of the people you surround yourself with, so try to be around happy, positive and uplifting people. Energy is infectious, have you notice when you visit certain places you feel happy and at other you want to run out as soon as you get there, this is all to do with the energy of the place. It’s same with people as well.
Being more social will decrease loneliness, and company healthy and happy people with positive energy will affect you in a positive way.
8. Help others
The best way to help others is to volunteer for an organization or a charity. But that’s not a compulsion, you can help other in your own way. Share a smile with the stranger who had a rough day at work can help uplifting his mood and can have a good evening. As they say, “Smile cost nothing but is priceless.”
We all feel good after helping others, it has an uplifting effect on our body and mind. But the secret to receive the ultimate benefits is don’t boost about you helping others, don’t even mention it to your partner. Keep that experience with you, by sharing it loses its magical power.
You can voluntarily offer your time, money or resources. The more positive energy you give the world, the more you will receive in return. This energy would enable you in doing what you love.
9. Fight Rumination
You can use pattern interruptions to fight rumination. When you are fighting rumination, an excellent way to stop it is to interrupt the pattern and force yourself to do something completely different. It is like you have a hyper focus on something negative. It is never productive, because it is not rational or solution oriented, it is only your excessive concern. You can try changing your physical environment like, go for a walk or sit outside. You can also call a friend, pick up a book or play music.
We all live in the era dominated by busyness of corporate world, where the protocol is more or less like a religion. There you need to know fundamental things to be productive, but more important is to have interaction and a stable mind to make it true productivity. There are few who seem to work well even under pressure, but that kind are rare, and we are human and imperfect. Having these little things like stress under our skins will not solve our problems. Sometimes it takes a little courage to admit that we are becoming addicted to work than telling us that we are not doing our best.